1st msg : “Let's break-up now,its all over ”
.
After few minutes
2nd msg : “Sorry, Sorry, Sorry that was not for you”
Teacher : Galti hone pe maafi magne wale ko kya kehte hai ???
.
Student : Samajhdar
.
Teacher : Aur galti na hone pe bhi maafi magne wale ko kya kehete hai ???
.
Student : Boyfriend
Girl in shop: Bhaiya koi valentine card hai Jisme likha ho
"Tum hi mera pehla aur akhri pyar ho"
.
shopkeper: Haan hai..
.
Girl: Theek hai jaldi se "10" de do
EK STUDENT KI KAHANI :-
.
Kal raat book meri taraf dekhti rhi
.
aur nind mujhe apni taraf khichti rhi
.
Nind ka jhoka mera man moh gaya
.
or
kal raat fir ek honhar studnt bina padhe so gaya
Ladies se bhari bus ka accident ho gya
.
Sari ladies mar gayi
.
Sabke pati 1-1 ghante roye
.
Ek aadmi akela 2 ghante roya
.
Kyun ???
.
Kyun ki uski patni ki bus chhut gayi the
Teacher: Batao bacho Hindi ki pehli silent movie konsi thi..??
.
Pappu: Madam, jab wo film silent thi to aapko kaise pata chala ki wo hindi me hai.. ??
Kavi ka beta School Me..
Teacher: what is Noun.. ??
.
Student: Arz karta hoon,
.
Kutta bhi hota Hai apni gali mein king,
Wah wah..
.
Kutta Bhi Hota hai Apni gali mein King..
.
Noun is a Name Of any person, place or thing.
Ladaka Universty me Ladaki se : Aapka Name??
.
Ladaki Ghussey se : Mujhey sab Behan kehtey hain.
.
Larka : O Acha to aap hain wo jiski waja se sab mujhey jeeja ji
jeeja ji Kehtey hain.
2 cockroch ICU me admit the..
.
1st:"Kisne mara.. ??
.
2nd:"Arey, kisi ne nahi, Ye saali ladkiyan
.
Mujhe dekh kar itna chillati hai ki heart attack aa jaata hai
Ek Pagal Nepali Se Bola: “ Tum American Ho? ”
Nepali: “ Nahi Main Nepali Hoon ”
Pagal: “ Tum American Ho? ”
Nepali: “ Kaha Na Main Nepali Hoon”
Pagal: “ Nahi-Nahi Tum Pakka American Ho ”
Nepali Gusse Se: “ Haan-Haan Main American Hoon ”
Pagal: “ Par Yaar Lagte to nepali ho”
1 Bachcha har Roz Math Teacher ko
Phone lagata
.
Teacher ki wife-
Kitni bar kaha wo Mar Gaye hai, baar
baar Phone Q karte ho?.
.
Baccha- Sun k Accha lgta hai....
Ladki: Ladke honest hone chahiye... smart toh phone bhi
hota hai
.
Ladka: Ladkiya dil se achhi honi chahiye.... "Hot" to
aalu ke parathe bhi hote hai...
Girls ka group waterfall dekhne k liye gaya...
Pappu (guide):"ye duniya ka sab se bada waterfall hai,
Is waterfall ki intensity bahut jyada hai..,
Agar yaha se 20 supersonic planes b gujrege to b hum
is waterfall ki awaz bade aram se sun sakte hai..
Ab Sabhi girls se request hai ki aap plzzz chup rahe
Taki hum waterfall ki awaz sun sake
A teacher broke traffic signal,,
.
Police officer arrest her,,
.
Teacher please let me go "I am a teacher"
.
Police officer "oh ho I have waited this moment whole year"
Now write 10000 times that
"I WILL NEVER BREAK TRAFFIC SIGNAL AGAIN"
Ye Hota Hai Badla
Teacher- Chand par pehla kadam kisne rakha?
.
Pappu- NEIL AMSTRONG.
.
Teacher- Aur doosra?
.
Pappu : doosra bhi usi ne rakha hoga.
Langda thodi tha woh
Teacher- pani me rahne vale 5 jiv batao.?
Santa- mendak.
Teacher- very good aur char bolo.?
Santa- uski maa ,uska baap , uski behan aur uski GIRLFRIEND
Ek Sardar library me 3 Ghante 1 Book padhne ke Baad bola
SO BORING itne sare characters but no story.
Librarian- Sardar Ji, wo TELEPHONE DIARY thi.
Customer: Mujhe phone per dhamkiya mill rahi hai.
Police: Kaun hai woh jo aapko dhamkiya de raha hai?
Customer: Telephone wale bolte hai ke, “Bill nahi bharoge toh kaat denge.”
Teacher: raju, tum kis liye college aate ho? ,
Student: vidya ke khatir
Teacher: toh ab so kyu rahe ho? ,
Student: aaj vidya nahi aayi hai Mam.
Teacher: OXFORD matlab kya hai?
Student: OX matlab bail, FORD matlab Gaadi. to OXFORD matlab bail gaadi
Doctor: is dawaa ko ek hafte main poora karo aur baad main aake milo.
Patient: teek hai doctor
(ek hafte ke baad)
Doctor: dawaa khatam huaa kya?
Patient: nahi doctor.
Doctor: kyu nahi?
Patient: usme likhaa thaa ke, bottle ko hamesha bandh rakhe
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